I thought this was cute. Mine are in red :)
1. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
2. A 3-year-old is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
3. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a large room.
5. When using the ceiling fan as a baseball bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6. The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too late.
8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9. A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
10. Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a six-year-old. "pennies do too"
11. "Play-Doh" and "microwave" should never be used in the same sentence.
12. Super glue is forever.
13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O. Vacuum cleaners too!
15. VCRs do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot house 4 inches deep.
17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise in a moving car.
18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens.
20. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy. It will, however, make cats dizzy.
21. Cats spit up twice their body weight when dizzy.
22. when you mix cherry, black cherry, grape, & lemonade kool-aid packet powder on the table with your hands they turn midnight red and doesn't come off.... But the little hands are sweet after the sugar is added to the table.
23. frogs in pockets do NOT survive the spin cycle.
24. 4yr olds really can climb just as high as older siblings .... only they hit every branch on the way down and believe it or not - they do BOUNCE when they hit bottom! (only to get up MAD and try it all over again!!!)
In my case it's a 2 yr old daredevil
25. Peas Can Really Fly Across A Room --- When Shot Out Of The Nose
26. pudding is not shaving cream
27. one roll of duct tape will hold a 3 year old onto a wall & entertain a him and old brother for hours
28. tar does not come out of hair
29. mayo and peanut butter does get gum out of hair (but not out of nose..)
30. That A Penny Can Fit Nicely Into My Dvr Memory Card Slot But Dont Come Out To Easy.....
31. That a 2 yr olds head makes a much bigger hole in the wall when he thinks he's a super hero then you would think!!!!
32. That you can drink a juice box through your nose!
33. crayons do not need to be washed and it is a bad idea to put them in the laundry because they will ruin ALL the clothes in that batch
34. that a whole brand new tube of toothpaste makes great finger paint all over the bathroom and your 3yr old...and is a sticky mess to clean up
35. DON'T LEAVE THE PEANUTBUTTER
JAR OPEN ON THE COUNTER..... WHY? BECAUSE PEANUTBUTTER DOES NOT MAKE A VERY GOOD SHAMPOO!
I've learned a lot from my kiddos, ages 4, 2 and 1! Let me know if you post this, I would love to know what your kiddos taught you even if they're in their 30's :)